new blog

I feel like creating another blog, ya know? Like another one which shows the other side of myself... Meaning, like when I feel totally depressed... I can like write crap on the other blog. Cuz... (to my parents just in case they reading) I like cannot say my REAL feelings here. When I totally feel like scolding bad words or wadeva, my parents would come and see and then, lecture.... so yeah...

Yeah, lately, I have been feeling DEPRESSED.... I like... I feel like as if everything that I do is so meaningless and the results I get are bad, so, what's the use? There was once (a confession) when I felt like DYING. Scary right? Well, coincidentally, I had my period then and I lost 2 of my precious stuff. My softball glove (but found it in the end) and my wallet. My wallet was during the BBQ when I wrote bad stuff on this blog. Remember? I was crying when I was bathing. I felt life was damn meaningless and that it was only for us to suffer.... Yep, sounds kinda like depression. I even thought of the ways to die...... Kk, now I am freaking myself out too.... And to my parents if they see this: PLEASE don't give me some prep talk. Thanks. But I got over it. However, sometimes, I would still get that feeling...

My softball throwing is not good, so I am like feel like as if I am the black sheep of my team liddat. I feel like as if I am dragging them down. Actually, I need not be in the team cuz there is already enough team members.... And, yeah. But then, my friends are like always encouraging me, so that keeps me going. :D Thanks u gals.

Today, I made pizza using bread, sausage, green pepper, cheeze, tomatoes and the tomato paste. :) Was a great breakfast I must say so myself. Very fufilling. Lunch was chao kway teow. I think that that was an achievement. Today was one of the best days with my family I guess. Usually, I just dont feel like talking to them. Sometimes I find them irritating. XD But today was nice. :) Love it today! I suddenly feel like going to Genting this year!!!! :P

Oh yah, almost forgot. HAPPY MOONCAKE FESTIVAL!!!!!!! My school celebrated on Friday. Was soooooo fun!!!! But the concert, the centrestage finalist is like.... err... not good. I think her tune is okay but her voice no strength and she pronounciation no clear. I was thinking, "How did she win???" and Valen was at the back kicking my chair. D: Haha, but after I kept ignoring him, he stop. XD My belief: To deal with these kind of people, just ignore them. XP

This life is an instance in our immortal soul~